Adventures of the spawn: Evie's birth story

Evie is now almost 5 10 13 days old (this is how bad I am about getting pictures off our phones)

I am finally starting to feel a little more human - at least enough to go online. On another note, after 9 days of this nonsense I'm pretty sure the chinese confinement period was created to keep new mothers from feeling human for as long as possible and for the grandparents to steal the baby from you while they force you on bedrest.

SO BEFORE I FORGET (because I'm already starting to), onto the documentation of Evie's birth story.

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After we got the ultrasound for the mass in my breast and the radiologist told us it was probably cancer (but before biopsy and results), we immediately scheduled an induction date for Evie. Fortunately she was 38 weeks and a day by then so we were only a few days off from 39 weeks where she would be considered full term. We scheduled the induction date for the following Tuesday and I spent the next few days downing as many vitamins and tea as I could handle to get over my cold. Fortunately I was able to get through my congestion by induction day and I just had an annoying cough left. I think the cough helped me push but was a HUGE pain in the ass AFTER the baby was born cause coughing would hurt everythingg.

Induction day
We were supposed to go to the hospital at 9AM and the OB told us to call an hour before to get a room but when we called at 8AM apparently there had been a baby explosion at the hospital and they were OUT OF ROOMS. We definitely pulled the cancer card there and they put us at the top of the list for us to go in at 3PM (otherwise c-section deliveries usually get priority). Everything was packed for the hospital and in the car so we didn't have else to do but try to speed this baby along. So we went on a longass walk for two hours where my pregnant self had to rest every 30m on whatever sit-able surface we could find. They tell you not to eat before induction in the case you should need an emergency c-section so by 12PM I was super super hangry. FORTUNATELY we called the OB and she said I could eat so I inhaled whatever first store we came across on our walk around Cupertino (happened to be Ike's) and was a far more reasonable human being after that.

At 2PM we headed over to the hospital, checked in, and they put us in this dungeon-esque room to get me set up. I basically just had to change out of my regular clothes and into this lovely pink backless hospital gown, and get hooked up to a couple monitors to monitor my contractions and the baby's heartbeat. After an hour they moved us into a bigger room with a window (thank god cause that dungeon room was pretty depressing) and then the needles started coming so then it became far less fun. So first was a blood draw for something I can't remember anymore, and then they stuck the IV in for the Pitocin and saline to keep me hydrated. The IV was by far the most annoying thing about labor as they left it in there overnight and it was super uncomfortable.

The fun part. Before anything happened.

First dungeon-room we were in

Bigger room- Eric with his dinner that I could stare and watch him eat D:

IV started - I hate this thing. It was far less fun from here on out

Because I was already 3cm dilated and my cervix was all nice and soft, I could go straight into Pitocin which causes contractions and didn't have to go through an overnight stay where they put a pill in your cervix to chemically induce it to ripen. I had read that Pitocin contractions sometimes hits the mom super hard at 20m but after about an hour I still wasn't feeling much. About an hour and a half in I started to feel cramps that feel like light menstrual cramps and it was totally manageable as I just sat there and watched Netflix.

Around 9PM the cramping got a bit worse but as long as I was sitting on the exercise ball and moving around it was also still totally manageable

By 10PM the contractions were getting pretty strong. Enough so that I had to suck it up during each contraction but felt nothing inbetween contractions. At this point the OB came in to check on me and cheerfully said everything was moving along and she'd come break my water in the morning. I was back to my hangry self and my reaction was IN THE MORNING?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! I didn't want to ask for an epidural until I was getting close to not being able to stand it anymore as I hear it can slow labor down but by 10:30 I was like well, it's not TERRIBLE but noooo way am I sleeping through the night with this pain to make it to the OB coming in in the early morning to break my water so I asked for the epidural.

Good thing I asked for it then cause right after that the contractions started coming in strong and it was getting pretty painful. The anesthesiologist came in, ordered Eric to sit in the chair in the furthest corner in the room and explained the procedure to me. He mentioned it should be pretty easy cause I'm pretty skinny and then made a fingernail indent where the shot would go. Then he scrubbed down my back with sterilizer and gave me the local anesthesia shot. That stung a bit and basically felt like what you'd expect, a shot in your back but after that it was fine and I didn't even feel the epidural catheter go in. There is a risk that your epidural drains to whatever side is tilted lower so he told me to flip sides every now and then to make sure the anesthesia would be equal on both sides.

Somehow the epidural was only hitting my left side as I could feel my left leg go numb but holyyy shit I was still feeling the contractions on my right side. I was getting a lot of back pain too which I later found out was due to Evie being face up instead of facing my back. At this point I was shaking violently, which I've recently found out my body does when it gets hit with a ton of unexpected pain, and scaring the crap out of Eric. After 15m of lying on my right side desperately hoping the epidural would drain into my right side I demanded the anesthesiologist come back in and fix it. At this point my water broke much to my surprise. Oh also at this point they had also put a catheter in me so I don't end up peeing all over myself. Needless to say, you pretty much lose the ability to feel shame after going to the hospital. I used to worry about pooping during labor but really couldn't have cared less through the whole process.

After the anesthesiologist fixed my epidural catheter by pulling out a bit (turns out it was a little too far in and only going into my left side) I stopped shaking and felt SUPER relaxed. The nurse came in to check and confirmed my water had broken and I was fully dilated. I asked her if the baby had hair and she sadly told me no BUT THANKFULLY THAT WASN'T TRUE. She was going to have me do a trial push to see if the baby progresses but did a quick check and was like "NOPE, baby is too far down and coming now, I'm calling the dr, DO NOT PUSH". I could still feel some pressure (like you have to poop) but didn't feel the need to push or anything so I was totally fine just lying there enjoying my pain free moments.

The OB arrived 15m later at 12:30AM and we started pushing. It was pretty much the most anticlimatic thing ever. By this point I couldn't feel my left leg at all and had also lost the sensation of pressure as the anesthesiologist had given me another dose when he came the last time. Pretty much pushing was just them telling me I was having a contraction based on the monitor and I'd haul myself up into a "pushing" position (basically an ab crunch) that I vaguely remember them teaching me in birthing class. Then after 3 big breaths and 3 pushes I'd flop back down and the OB and nurse go back to discussing where they've been the past few years until the next contraction showed up on the monitor.

This went on for an hour during which I REALLYY wanted to take a nap and remember thinking "I thought pushing was supposed to be fast". The OB and nurse were very supportive and kept telling me good job and in my epidural-induced euphoria I happily accepted all the compliments. Then halfway through the nurse told me that she could now see a silver dollar sized circle of the baby's head and my reaction was "THAT'S IT!?! I'M GOING TO BE HERE FOR A WEEK". An hour later I pushed my last push and Evie came out and the plopped her onto my belly/chest area for skin to skin time. She only squeaked once and I remember poking at her wondering if she was alive. Also I could only see the top of her head so I had to ask Eric to take a picture of her so I could see what she looked like. Evie immediately started rooting and it was super easy to ignore whatever else they were doing to me down there (delivering the placenta and stitching me back up since I tore a bit, but no episiotomy!) and I didn't feel any of that.

From there they finished cleaning me up, weighed the baby, and Eric finally got to hold her after an hour. My labor was technically 3.5 hours as they count it from the time of cervical change to delivery which is SUPER short for a first time baby especially for induced first time baby. I also found out later that I was super lucky as most babies who are in the position Evie was in end up with an emergency c-section.

My mom and sister showed up to see the baby and after a couple hours they wheeled me into the mother/baby room and we signed papers and were pestered by nurses until 5AM when they finally let us sleep.